At first some of us tried to avoid the issue, hoping against hope we were not true alcoholics. The show doesnt come off very well. It is an effort to discover the truth about the stock-in-trade. An exceptional man, he remained bone dry for twenty-five years and retired at the age of fifty-five, after a successful and happy business career. But life among Alcoholics Anonymous is more than attending gatherings and visiting hospitals. What a state of mental goose-flesh that used to bring on! For example, we know of situations in which the alcoholic or his wife have had love affairs. The problem with which you struggle usually falls within one of four categories: One: Your husband may be only a heavy drinker. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. My library Opposite of every page is a blank page for all your additional writing. It should not matter, however, if someone does throw us out of his office. Read this book. In the early days of our drinking we occasionally remained sober for a year or more, becoming serious drinkers again later. 12 pt type - divide your word count by 350. Certainly I was interested. If your man accepts your offer, it should be pointed out that physical treatment is but a small part of the picture. We hope this book has answered some of them. The word God still aroused a certain antipathy. Sometimes there were screaming delirium and insanity. OUR WOMEN FOLK have suggested certain attitudes a wife may take with the husband who is recovering. They are being fulfilled among us-sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. Oddly enough, he is often difficult to deal with. The best way to get in touch with Alcoholics Anonymous is through your local telephone book by simply looking up Alcoholics Anonymous in the White Pages. When you come through the doors of AA, it is suggested that you purchase a Big Book. Alcoholics Anonymous, also known as the "Big Book," presents the A.A. program for recovery from alcoholism. You will note that we made an important qualification. In no time I was beating on the bar asking myself how it happened. Then comes a baker's dozen personal stories, and the apparent miraculous relief that certain problem drinkers have experienced, armed only with the hope that there just might be another way to live without having to fight constantly with . The man must decide for himself. Welcome to silkworth.net. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that he does not have to agree with your conception of God. Some of us had already walked far over the Bridge of Reason toward the desired shore of faith. In one western city and its environs there are one thousand of us and our families. Big Book, page 164. If not irritable, he may seem dull and boring, not gay and affectionate as the family would like him to be. Seeing your attempt to understand and help, some men will try to take advantage of your kindness. This man has a charming wife and family. If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right- about-face and drink like a gentleman, our hats are off to him. It went into certain securities, then cheap and rather unpopular. When father takes this tack, the family may react unfavorably. Your desire to protect him should not cause you to lie to people when they have a right to know were he is and what he is doing. I was finished and so were many friends. When the man is presented with this volume it is best that no one tell him he must abide by its suggestions. 12-a. The Actj.on repeated stipulations set forth in a 1995 Conference Advisory Action: namely that the first 164 pages--the Preface, the forewords, the section entitled "The Doctor's Opinion," the chapter "Dr. Bob's The First 164 pages of The Big One of many good places to begin is in Alcoholics Anonymous (aka the Big Book), specifically Chapter 4, We Agnostics.. Wait for the end of the spree, or at least for a lucid interval. If the owner of the business is to be successful, he cannot fool himself about values. I saw that will power and self-knowledge would not help in those strange mental blank spots. He was on a different footing. We realize some men are thoroughly bad-intentioned, that no amount of patience will make any difference. Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. We stood at the turning point. I had to be, for I was hopeless. But by studying this book I learned (p. 29) that the clear-cut directions are in the first 164 pages, but the story section of a different ilk. Next day they would be themselves again and we would forgive and try to forget. We believe a man should be thoroughly probed on these points. After all, had he not been sober six months now? Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book First 164. When you discover a prospect for Alcoholics Anonymous, find out all you can about him. You will be handicapped if you arouse it. I hardly dared cross the street, lest I collapse and be run down by an early morning truck, for it was scarcely daylight. Your man will fare better if placed in such physical condition that he can think straight and no longer craves liquor. We missed the reality and the beauty of the forest because we were diverted by the ugliness of some of its trees. I saw I could not take so much as one drink. As our work spreads and our numbers increase, we hope your employees may be put in personal contact with some of us. It is not good for him, and it sometimes creates serious complications in a family. Dad is not so spiritual after all, they say. His call to the clergyman led him presently to a certain resident of the town, who, though formerly able and respected, was then nearing the nadir of alcoholic despair. Let us have a look at some of them. He decides to exert himself more. Now, this house will hardly accommodate its weekly visitors, for they number sixty or eighty as a rule. Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives. I ruthlessly faced my sins and became willing to have my new-found Friend take them away, root and branch. Print a copy of the first side (print page 1 only), then reinsert it into the paper tray of your printer and print page 2. They took inventory all right, but hung on to some of the worst items in stock. In fact, his rival was ruined. Offer him friendship and fellowship. The wife should fully understand his new way of life. He found a total of 401 changes to the first 164 pages. Science may one day accomplish this, but it hasnt done so yet. This should suggest a useful program for anyone concerned with a drinking problem. With this attitude you cannot fail. We cannot be helpful to all people, but at least God will show us how to take a kindly and tolerant view of each and every one. How could they? He trembles to think someone might have observed him. Beginning with such complaints, a barrier arises. I am enclosing an attachment below of the books that the first 100 guys read before there was AA and a Big Book. We want to stay out of this controversy. How To Say Flute In Italian, We have had retaliatory love affairs with other men. But it was never meant to be inerrant. Nonsense. In the face of collapse and despair, in the face of the total failure of their human resources, they found that a new power, peace, happiness, and sense of direction flowed into them. But we must be careful not to drift into worry, remorse or morbid reflection, for that would diminish our usefulness to others. Because this book has become the basic text for our Society 5-b. In the morning we have kissed and made up. We have entered the world of the Spirit. We have been driven to maudlin sympathy, to bitter resentment. The story he told is most instructive, for here was a chap absolutely convinced he had to stop drinking, who had no excuse for drinking, who exhibited splendid judgment and determination in all his other concerns, yet was flat on his back nevertheless. Ask any woman who has sent her husband to distant places on the theory he would escape the alcohol problem. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. The Big Book App contains the first 164 pages and Doctor Bobs story. We must, or it kills us! They can take it or leave it alone. Unless your friend wants to talk further about himself, do not wear out your welcome. Sorting and rendering passages in the proprietary format of the 164 and More concordance does not in any way imply affiliation with or endorsement by either This page was created to provide a place where these others can be collected. They remember when father was romantic, thoughtful and successful. If the book is read the moment the patient is able, while acutely depressed, realization of his condition may come to him. 40 When was the Second edition of the Big Book introduced? Who of us had not loved something or somebody? Whether you mention this book is a matter for your discretion. With ministers, and the worlds religions, I parted right there. Talk about his condition or this book only when he raises the issue. Though once like number two he became worse. Many an alcoholic who entered there came away with an answer. If your God is not Powerful enough to heal your alcoholic mind, fire His ass and start praying to a God that will transform us to recovered status. If you are as seriously alcoholic as we were, we believe there is no middle-of-the-road solution. Sunlight of the Spirit: 1 (page 66) Supreme Being: 1 (page 46) Spirit, world of the: 1 (page 84) His Spirit: 1 (page 85) Total references to God in one form or another: 281. Instead, the problem has been removed. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves. God either is, or He isnt. But you must be on guard not to embarrass or harm your husband. I pushed a drink across the table. If he feels free to discuss his problems with you, if he knows you under-stand and will not be upset by anything he wishes to say, he will probably be off to a fast start. Starting from a speck on the domestic horizon, great thunderclouds of dispute may gather. Who are you fellows, and why this private room? There is talk about spiritual matters morning, noon and night. Little by little the family may see their own defects and admit them. The First 164 pages of The Big Book with lined pages opposite text for note taking. We asked him to tell us exactly how it happened. Doctors are rightly loath to tell alcoholic patients the whole story unless it will serve some good purpose. Well, just that did happen and more, for what I had learned of alcoholism did not occur to me at all. The alcoholic may say to himself in the most casual way, It wont burn me this time, so heres how! Or perhaps he doesnt think at all. If he wishes to talk, let him do so. It was a crushing blow. Let him ask you that question, if he will. But above all, we tried to be sensible on this question. He now returned home, leaving behind his first acquaintance, the lawyer and the devil-may-care chap. We trust infinite God rather than our finite selves. Our friends gorge rose as he bitterly cried out: If there is a God, He certainly hasnt done anything for me! But later, alone in his room, he asked himself this question: Is it possible that all the religious people I have known are wrong? While pondering the answer he felt as though he lived in hell. Therefore, we are not to be the hasty and foolish martyr who would needlessly sacrifice others to save himself from the alcoholic pit. If he had these qualities and did not drink would he be worth retaining? Morning Prayer and Meditation Given we know that the AA program is contained in the first 164 pages of the Big Book ( with further good information in the step essays of the 12 steps and 12 traditions book ) Contains Ads. Try to have him bring up the subject himself. As we shall see, he now means a great deal to his community, and the major liabilities of thirty years of hard drinking have been repaired in four. Wherever men are gathered together in business there will be rivalries and, arising out of these, a certain amount of office politics. Up to this point you would label him as a foolish chap having queer ideas of fun. Have we skimped on the cement put into the foundation? If you are an alcoholic, you are a mighty sick man. This may lead to lonely evenings for you. The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Some of the promises are directly associated with completion of a step. He might be shocked if he knew how much alcoholism is costing his organization a year. But after a while we had to face the fact that we must find a spiritual basis of life-or else. The Big Book - first 164 pages. Have there been any significant changes in the first 164 pages? Below are copies in various formats of the Big Book. If common words were not discarded, the The web site uses a less-restrictive set of common words than the printed book. BB pg 100-101. by medic63 Wed Feb 03, 2016 9:23 am. You are betting, of course, that your changed attitude plus the contents of this book will turn the trick. Whether you're new to AA, or you're a seasoned veteran, this is the easiest and most useful app to aid in your recovery. She went to court and got an order for his arrest. But we dont delay if it can be avoided. I now remembered what my alcoholic friends had told me, how they prophesied that if I had an alcoholic mind, the time and place would come-I would drink again. 4-b. She would soon have to give me over to the undertaker or the asylum. Let him draw his own conclusion. He looked straight at me. Successful readjustment means the opposite. Until such an understanding is reached, little or nothing can be accomplished. The almost certain consequences that follow taking even a glass of beer do not crowd into the mind to deter us. Perhaps there are some cases where the utmost frankness is demanded. There was always one more attempt-and one more failure. We think each family which has been relieved owes something to those who have not, and when the occasion requires, each member of it should be only too willing to bring former mistakes, no matter how grievous, out of their hiding places. He does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking. We think few, to whom this book will appeal, can stay dry anything like a year. As our husbands began to apply spiritual principles in their lives, we began to see the desirability of doing so too. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. We feel a man is unthinking when he says that sobriety is enough. We may kill a future opportunity to carry a beneficial message. Yet all reasons for not drinking were easily pushed aside in favor of the foolish idea that he could take whiskey if only he mixed it with milk! Alcoholics Anonymous-The Big Book-has served as a lifeline to millions worldwide.First published in 1939, Alcoholics Anonymous sets forth cornerstone concepts of recovery from alcoholism and tells the stories of men and women who have overcome the disease. The main thing is that he be willing to believe in a Power greater than himself and that he live by spiritual principles. Common words are needed to keep the book to a reasonable size and an affordable cost. Undoubtedly we should admit our fault. Sometimes mother and children dont think so. To a person who has had experience with an alcoholic, this may seem like tempting Providence, but it isnt. These are the realities for us. Suddenly the thought crossed my mind that if I were to put an ounce of whiskey in my milk it couldnt hurt me on a full stomach. This case contains a powerful lesson. Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to. Our first example is a friend we shall call Jim. If you act upon these principles, your husband may stop or moderate. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. First published in 1939, its purpose was to show other alcoholics how the first 100 people of A.A. got sober. 1 second ago. At a proper time and place explain to all your friends why alcohol disagrees with you. He sometimes drinks in the morning and through the day also, to hold his nervousness in check. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. That All Powerful Idea is found in the first 164 pages of our big book. He gets stirred up about their troubles, but not at all about yours. Someone had pushed a drink my way, and I had taken it. The firm wants to help you get over it, and if you are interested, there is a way out. Though some of us resisted, we found no great difficulty in casting aside such feelings. God had restored his sanity. As we became subjects of King Alcohol, shivering denizens of his mad realm, the chilling vapor that is loneliness settled down. We never, never try to arrange a mans life so as to shield him from temptation. He seemed quite rational and well-balanced with respect to other problems. Opinions vary considerably as to why the alcoholic reacts differently from normal people. Leaving aside the drink question, they tell why living was so unsatisfactory. Cheerfully see him through more sprees. I wanted to throw up my hands in discouragement, for I saw that I had failed to help my banker friend understand. We stayed on and on. But the program of action, though entirely sensible, was pretty drastic. If you live in a large place, there are hundreds. I was to right all such matters to the utmost of my ability. For a moment I was alarmed, and called my friend, the doctor, to ask if I were still sane. If there is any indication that he wants to stop, have a good talk with the person most interested in him-usually his wife. If he does not want to stop drinking, dont waste time trying to persuade him. What they say will apply to nearly everyone bound by ties of blood or affection to an alcoholic. When possible, avoid meeting a man through his family. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. Next we launched out on a course of vigorous action, the first step of which is a personal housecleaning, which many of us had never attempted. High and low, rich and poor, these are future fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous. On through the years this conduct continues, accompanied by his continual promises to be careful or to keep off the streets altogether. I was to test my thinking by the new God-consciousness within. My ideas about miracles were drastically revised right then. A common theme throughout the book, especially in the first 164 pages, is the identification of a problem, the identification All the indexes we publish are for the 1st 164 pages (the main text). To his consternation, he found himself drunk half a dozen times in rapid succession. Do we owe an apology? This makes for discord and unhappiness. How Forty-Two Alcoholics Recovered From Their Malady - (pp. Even though your husband becomes unbearable and you have to leave him temporarily, you should, if you can, go without rancor. Then he fell victim to a belief which practically every alcoholic has-that his long period of sobriety and self- discipline had qualified him to drink as other men. Now we try to put spiritual principles to work in every department of our lives. A man we know had remarried. Sometimes he is a source of embarrassment to you and his friends. Includes the original Foreword, The Doctor's Opinion and Dr. Bob's Story. We have been speaking to you of serious, sometimes tragic things. We avoid retaliation or argument. Father, coming suddenly to life again, often begins to assert himself. Over and over, he would say: Thats me. To us it is not far- fetched, for this kind of thinking has been characteristic of every single one of us. If he shows interest, lend him your copy of this book. Is not each trying to arrange the family show to his liking? Perhaps we have committed a criminal offense which might land us in jail if it were known to the authorities. It stirs his imagination. As we look back, we feel we had gone on drinking many years beyond the point where we could quit on our will power. We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action. Perhaps you will want to take the man into your home for a few days. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day Thy will be done. We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. Therefore, the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind, rather than in his body. He told how he lived in constant worry about those who might find out about his alcoholism. The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward Gods universe. Big Book Study Edition (Softcover) This Big Book option is really great! In one of these there is a well-known hospital for the treatment of alcoholic and drug addiction. Dont, at this stage, refer to this book, unless he has seen it and wishes to discuss it. You might let them know you have no quarrel with the alcoholics of your organization. These memories are a nightmare. Husbands and wives have sometimes been obliged to separate for a time until new perspective, new victory over hurt pride could be re-won. In some cases it may be better to let someone outside the family present the book. While a general guideline is one page is 500 words (single spaced) or 250 words (double spaced), this is a ballpark figure. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. How could she be anything else? Students of ancient history tell us that the intellect of men in those days was equal to the best of today. Drinking cold small beer. The chances are he will not for, like yourself, he is just beginning his development. These members words are not necessarily in conjunction with the instruction pages. He may either plunge into a frantic attempt to get on his feet in business, or he may be so enthralled by his new life that he talks or thinks of little else. The truth is the number of words per page depends on a variety of factors such as the type of font, the font size, spacing elements, margin spacing, and paragraph length to name This is the key text that the Alcoholics Anonymous program is founded on, the first 164 pages of the Big Book. Because it helped so many people recover, the Alcoholics Anonymous organization did not change it. So, in one way or another, we discovered that faith had been involved all the time! He is a POWERFUL example of what it is like to be in recove. WE, OF ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, know thousands of men and women who were once just as hopeless as Bill. If it is a happy occasion, try to increase the pleasure of those there; if a business occasion, go and attend to your business enthusiastically. Well, so had I. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid. That is one of mans magnificent attributes. However intelligent we may have been in other respects, where alcohol has been involved, we have been strangely insane. Four: You may have a husband of whom you completely despair. Sometimes he drinks on the way home from the hospital. Liquor incapacitated father for so many years that mother became head of the house. A good personal image will ensure positive, lasting first impressions and can lea. Still no thought of drinking. Usually the family should not try to tell your story. Make it plain he is under no obligation to you, that you hope only that he will try to help other alcoholics when he escapes his own difficulties. Momentarily we did-then would come oblivion and the awful awakening to face the hideous Four Horsemen-Terror, Bewilderment, Frustration, Despair. Your new courage, good nature and lack of self-consciousness will do wonders for you socially. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. He will be less likely to drink again, and anything is preferable to that. We feel that each family, in the light of their own circumstances, ought to decide for themselves. Why lay ourselves open to being branded fanatics or religious bores? They have a new attitude, and they have been saved from a living death. So we had to get down to causes and conditions. Under these conditions your prospect will see he is under no pressure. Show him these things in yourself and they will be reflected back to you from him. Big Book History and Myths, Arthur S. Page 4 The major changes to the Big Book editions have been in the selection of personal stories so that they represent a good cross-section of the AA membership. He is under constant fear and tension- that makes for more drinking. They had said that though I did raise a defense, it would one day give way before some trivial reason for having a drink. Just be careful not to disagree in a resentful or critical spirit. Reply. According to the Big Book, how many copies were sold of the. If we can forget, so can she. Nothing would fix me. After a few years with an alcoholic, a wife gets worn out, resentful and uncommunicative. how many words are in the first 164 pages of the big book. * This refers to Bills first visit with Dr. Bob. There is company insurance. Yes, the old boy was on fire all right. A.A. Big Book (164 Pages) Big Book Stories Edition 1; Big Book Stories Edition 2; Mel B's Library; Dick B.'s Library; . With these we have had experience galore. If he means to right his past wrongs, why all this concern for everyone in the world but his family? Memorial Day Parade Near Me. Many a man, yet dazed from his hospital experience, has stepped over the threshold of that home into freedom. Though I had been only a nominal churchman, their proposals were not, intellectually, hard to swallow. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Big Book Studies are a great source of information to help enhance your recovery from Alcoholism. I loaded my Big Book onto my tablet and did a word search for worked / working and I found several uses of the word in the first 164 Foreword to the Second Edition Re: How many times should I read the big book? She was furious. Many of our husbands were just as far gone. If you have been successful in solving your own domestic problems, tell the newcomers family how that was accomplished. We find it a real mistake to dampen his enthusiasm for alcoholic work. He and his family can be a bright spot in such congregations. He talked for hours. The wording was, of course, quite optional so long as we expressed the idea,mvoicing it without reservation. Perhaps you enjoy drinking with him yourself when he doesnt go too far. I was part of life at last, and in the midst of the excitement I discovered liquor. For a while they would be their old sweet selves, only to dash the new structure of affection to pieces once more. In a few years he became so violent when intoxicated that he had to be committed. Coldest Day In Melbourne 2019, Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. Unfortunately a lot of prejudice exists. So our fellow worker will soon have friends galore. They were deeply religious people, much shocked by their sons refusal to have anything to do with the church. Next day we would ask ourselves, in all earnestness and sincerity, how it could have happened. Suppose we tell you some of the obstacles a family will meet; suppose we suggest how they may be avoided-even converted to good use for others. I was aghast. To some extent this is already true. Bitterly discouraged, he found himself in a strange place, discredited and almost broke. I ordered another sandwich and decided to have another glass of milk. Is he not, even in his best moments, a producer of confusion rather than harmony? A.A. World Services, Inc. has granted permission for If you cannot find the word you are seeking, try another word in the passage. We could wish to be moral, we could wish to be philosophically comforted, in fact, we could will these things with all our might, but the needed power wasnt there. Everybody believes them without a murmur of doubt. We have listed the people we have hurt by our conduct, and are willing to straighten out the past if we can. At the very beginning, the couple ought to frankly face the fact that each will have to yield here and there if the family is going to play an effective part in the new life. , however, if someone does throw us out of these, a producer of confusion rather than finite... Such an understanding is reached, little or nothing can be accomplished man will fare better if in! Book only when he says that sobriety is enough is to be recove! 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